so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Dignity is for republicans.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
