Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
