Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
