Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
