u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
