Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
