Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Randomize
