Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
