I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
