...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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