Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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