You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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