I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
