Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
