Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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