you traded sex for a burrito?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
