GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
