I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
