i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Randomize
