Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I want to have your abortion
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
When did angry sex become our thing?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Randomize