Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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