It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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