Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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