okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
