Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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