I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Boobs speak an international language.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
