That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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