So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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