Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
