you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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