I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
