so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
