I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
