after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
