My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I need to calm my uterus...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
