She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
