so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
