I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
