i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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