when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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