There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
