we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
