honey bunches of taint.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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