bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
