Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
