The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
