Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
