My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I just had sex on a roof
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
