We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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