I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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