My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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